Did I just cross the woo threshold? Am I finally owning the fact that I believe there is a major spiritual and physical component to being successful in business?
Okay. Let’s do this.
There are four key points on the calendar (okay, actually there are 8, but for sake of this, let’s stick to the more well known).
We have two Equinoxes – ushering in spring and autumn. These create balance. They offer a long view of your energy. They are energetic opportunities to recalibrate with your goals in mind.
In other words, if you want to work with Equinox energy, then you want to think of it as a time to quite literally re-centre.
And then we have the Solstices – winter and summer. Each of which represent periods of expansion and contraction.
I was born at sundown on the Winter Solstice. Maybe the only place I’m a true 1 percenter because the time of my birth makes me a true cusp. I have equal traits of a Sagittarius and a Capricorn. (I’m told 99% of people born on cusps aren’t true astrological cusps…and always fall into one sign or the other. I, however, do not.)
Interestingly enough, I also have a Gemini rising. Gemini being one of the signs of the Summer Solstice.
I’m a melting pot of Astrological stew. And the Solstices? They make me feel UNCOMFORTABLE.
Yesterday was no exception.
Summer Solstice is when we hit peak daylight and the days start to get shorter. It’s a time to ask yourself ‘what do I need to bring with me?’
And listen, if you aren’t willing to answer those questions yourself, the Universe? She’ll step in and answer them for you.
That’s what happened to me yesterday. Like a Mack truck. Like a bitch slap to the face.
The Universe slapped me into waking up and seeing what I needed to release and who I needed to move toward.
It slapped me into seeing what was clear in front of my face that I was unwilling to accept.
In reality, the Universe introduced me to energies and people who reminded me of WHY I do what I do and WHO I do it for.
It sent me an extremely negative experience to remind me of my positive charge. It sent me dark, to remind me to value the light.
But that? That’s uncomfortable. Because showing up positive in the face of negative by definition means you are in opposition.
Consider that the truth of the Solstice is that it signals the END of the light. (Though, we like to celebrate it being the beginning of summer; which is not really energetically or celestially what’s happening.)
Those who are woo-inclined would say it is now when the lightworkers are raging against losing themselves into the grey and black.
Last evening, I was taking a special yoga class. It was outdoors with about 10 other people. 108 sun salutations to celebrate the summer.
The instructor broke the session into nine groups of 12 salutations, each one having an intention.
Intentions were ‘I am open’, ‘I am grateful’, ‘I am strong’ and so on.
I whipped through the first few sets, with strength and fervour. Believing I was harnessing my inner openness, gratitude and strength with each pose.
But then a shift. My arms and legs got wobbly. My breath started to be more challenging to find.
I sunk into the grey.
That space between the light and the dark. Where my mind wanted to pull me into the darkness of the day’s events – events that dredged up feelings of isolation, inadequacy and fear.
But my body wanted to push forward.
The intention for that moment of flow was ‘I am happy’.
Strength? No problem.
Happiness? All the stuck energy.
As I found myself struggling with wobbly yoga poses and, at times, challenged breath – my mind was racing with all the fears of being judged, of wanting to believe other people like me, of feeling left out and estranged, but my body needed me to tell a different story.
My body needed me to be present and know that happiness is an inside job. That other people will never really know what’s inside my heart. That my business is my business and my movements and decisions are mine alone.
That my connection to my breath is all I need to connect to Source and Truth.
My body and mind were sitting in a duel in that grey, cuspy, space between light and dark.
Releasing the hateful and unsupportive words that had been hurled at me earlier. Releasing the expectations that anyone else has my happiness or heart to hold. Releasing the expectations that any one thing was the key to being happy.
Sinking into the ground and knowing that we are all always eternally supported by the ground beneath our feet and the sky above us.
Sinking into the knowing that happiness is a choice – not always easy and not always at arm’s length, but a choice nonetheless.
Sinking into the knowing that the nuance in the grey between the light and the dark is a time of magic…
Sinking into the knowing that I was born in that nuanced moment between the light and the dark, between the winter and the summer, between the releasing and the becoming.
And so, today I release so that I will become.